My Step-Father’s Cremation

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Antonio Enrico Martini was cremated on 19th April 2013. He had been a chef for many years and one of his friends, whose name I shall add here when I remember it – read this Address to a chef when Enrico retired in 1987. The version below, was amended from the 1987 version. Both are based on Address to a Pudding by Rabbie Burns.

Address To A Chef

Fair fa' your honest sonsie face,
Great Enrico o' th' Italian Race,
Ye cam' amang us lang years since, an' did enthrall,
Wi' savoury dish o' string an' mince, cried Spaggi Bol!

Mony's the nicht we've supped your fare
Chosen frae menu wi lovin' care;
Aft times tempted tae hae some mair, o' Tagliatelli.
The end result, ye can be share – an ower-full belly!

Aye, greed's a tempter, there's nae doot,
When faced wi' grub that's unco' good,
Tae get stuck in tae favoured food, like Canelloni,
An' then consume, in reckless mood, Zabaglione!

That menu's fu' o' names exotto,
Like Lasagne and Risotto,
Try them a'! - That's been my motto – have nae fear,
This chef, say I, (no voce sotto), has nae peer.

Now every king must hae his queen,
Wha better then than Bonnie Jean!
Her work, it seems, is nivver deen, an' man she's fleet,
The quickest thing ye've ivver seen on jist twa feet!

Well, that wis then – his course is run,
The time has come; it waits for none,
Sae fare-thee-well tae San Remo's son, oor heart's wi' Jeannie,
Rest aye in peace the only one full-proof Martini.

As Amended 19th April 2013

Rest in peace Enrico. Your Lasagne will always be the best.

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